Acne Makes Me Sad

acne makes me sad / nicolemcaruso.com

A few months ago I tried a new skincare product; a cult favorite, made by a brand I have been dying to try because I love their aesthetic, mission, and their founder's story. So after staring at the sample for what seemed like months, I grabbed it and went to town. It's a treatment, so I left it on for about 20 minutes and rinsed it off, then went to bed. 

The next morning I got up, started my coffee, and went into the bathroom only to catch a blurry glimpse of myself in the mirror. My skin felt tingly, so I looked into the mirror and I gasped. Holy. Moly. Every pore was clogged. My entire face was dotted with rounded pink bumps. Immediately, I was emotionally triggered to High School Me. I panicked, I started rummaging through my medicine cabinet frantically looking for some sort of miracle to make it go away, fast. 

In high school I had terrible acne. It was painful, red, bumpy, and really changed the entire look and shape of my face. Having acne affected my confidence, and I started to act more shy and unsure of myself. Most times my voice would crack if I had the courage to raise my hand in class-- so embarrassing. I always wore my long hair down so it would cover the sides of my face; I never wore lipstick so it didn't draw attention to my skin; and I was a loyal Proactiv customer, with bleached pillow cases to prove it. Acne affected my confidence in ways I truly could not understand until now, since my skin has cleared after making some serious dietary changes

The day of the crazy allergic reaction, I tried to cover my hot, bumpy skin with my usual go to: Make Up Forever Ultra HD Invisible Cover Foundation Stick. It's full coverage and can be built up for areas that need more coverage or thinned out for a more sheer look. As I striped it over my skin, as I usually do, I felt that uncomfortable dull pressure as it grazed every little blemish. It hurt to apply makeup. Seriously, I felt like an awkward teenager again; questioning myself as I applied it, like, "am I even doing this right?". Then, I tried rubbing it in with my fingers because my skin was so inflamed and oily, but the makeup wasn't sinking in like it usually does. I had to keep applying more, and it left me feeling like I was wearing too much. I skipped bronzer and blush, kept my eyeshadow and lips matte, and powdered my skin to take away all of the shine. It was a process; one I know too well, but had completely forgotten about. 

I wanted to write about this because I know so many people deal with acne. Whether you get the once-a-month hormonal explosion or have ongoing issues with it, acne dampens self-confidence, makes getting ready a chore, and can be costly to keep up with all of the products. I know how you feel. And I know how paralyzing it can be when you feel sad, unattractive, or like you don't want to leave the house or go through the somewhat process of applying makeup to cover everything. 

Though I could have lived without it, this little incident was a good reminder. Not everyone has a smooth canvas for makeup, and that can be a bit discouraging. Very soon, I plan to create a video tutorial showing my exact technique for covering blemishes without looking overdone. There are a few tricks I would love to share with you.

If you follow my instagram stories, you may have seen me mixing up a mask during this fiasco and hoping for the best. Well, it worked! It seriously calmed my skin and soothed the bumps, after about 5 days of using the mask. I mixed 1 tsp raw honey with 1 tsp Aztec Healing Clay, and applying that to my face twice a day. Within about 5 days, my skin was back to normal. Though I know not everyone can get rid of acne in 5 days, I highly recommend trying the mask to calm the inflammation, and a few other products to keep the acne at bay. 

SHOP MY FAVORITES FOR ACNE-PRONE SKIN

Nicole M. Caruso

I was born in Manhattan to two native New Yorkers who met working in the Garment Industry. Fashion was the family business. Suburban Connecticut is where I grew up and often daydreamed about someday attending New York Fashion Week.

When I was in college studying Communication & Media, I met the man of my dreams. We married nearly one year after our first date, and have been adventuring together ever since. While we moved around the country for his job, I freelanced as a makeup artist, worked in retail, and blogged about style & beauty as a creative outlet. 

Moving back to New York led to serendipitously working for two major fashion houses, where I learned the ins and outs of the industry, and attended Fashion Week both backstage and in the tents. Soon after, Verily Magazine brought me on as Beauty Editor, which was my dream job. It combined all of my passions and hobbies into one, and granted me a deeper understanding of print and digital media. One year after that, I had my daughter and experienced true fulfillment in motherhood. 

Everywhere I have traveled, I have met incredible women who inspired me to be the best version of myself; to wake up every day feeling confident and ready to Carpe Diem. I want to inspire women to explore their feminine genius by investing in their self-worth. This lifestyle blog is the place where I can share my worldview, my experiences, and my tips and tricks to live a more fulfilling life, which include expert style and beauty advice, tips for healthy living, and reflections on marriage and motherhood.